SPIRITUAL FRIENDSHIP

BY PR NANCY LIM

            When I think about spiritual friendship in the Bible, David and Jonathan naturally come to mind. To me, there are 3 important qualities of true spiritual friendship.

            The first quality is Transparency. True spiritual friends are willing to be vulnerable and  to share their personal struggles or fears with each other. They build a deep bond that goes beyond sharing the same love for food, shopping or Korean dramas. They are willing to share about the challenges that they face in their relationships, the emotional wounds that they had suffered for years or the deepest fear in their hearts. Most importantly, they share a common bond in their love for God and are concerned for each other’s spiritual walk with God. 

            The Scripture tells us in 1 Samuel 18:1 “the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.” There was an immediate bond between Jonathan and David at their first meeting. I’m afraid this does not happen often. For most people, it takes time to build true spiritual friendship. There are also some risks that we must be willing to bear in the process. Are you willing to take the risk of being disappointed, betrayed or hurt because the person whom you thought was a worthy friend turned out otherwise?

            The second quality of true spiritual friendship is Trust. True spiritual friends are loyal to each other, and one party can trust that the other person would not break confidentiality of any personal information that was shared. It is evident that David trusted Jonathan when he fled from Saul’s pursuit in Ramah to look for Jonathan in Jerusalem, knowing well that this was a dangerous place to go to since Saul’s palace was located there. David confided in Jonathan “What have I done? What is my guilt? And what is my sin before your father, that he seeks my life?” (1 Samuel 20:1).

            Jonathan showed his loyal love to David with these words “Whatever you say, I will do for you.” (1 Samuel 20:4). After Jonathan had confirmed that his father was determined to put David to death, he helped David to flee. Both were in tears as they bid each other farewell (1 Samuel 20:33, 41). When Saul continued to be hot on David’s heels, Jonathan went to find David and encouraged him to stay strong in his faith in God (1 Samuel 23:16). 

            Is there a friend that you can run to when you are in trouble? Are you able to share your deepest or even ugliest thoughts with him/her without being afraid that you will be judged? Is this friend able to encourage you in the Lord when you are feeling down?  Proverbs 18:24 tells us “One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (NIV).

            The third quality on my list is the commitment to Treasure One Another. True spiritual friends never fail to make time for one another. They put each other’s interest before their own. They are committed to pray for each other and bear each other’s burdens. They will avail themselves whenever the other party needs help, and even offer help without being asked. 

            Do you wish to be blessed with the kind of spiritual friendship between Jonathan and David? When you put your trust in Jesus, you will find the most beautiful form of friendship. Jesus said “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends… I have called you friends.” (John 15:13,15).

            At GPC, our Care Groups and other fellowship groups give us ample opportunities to find true spiritual friendship. During this CG month, step out of your comfort zone and learn to be transparent with, and to trust and treasure one another.