Family Baggage

How to deal with family baggage? It hurts our relationship.

Before I even begin to speak, I might feel trapped in a cycle of presumption, anticipating each other’s responses. This lack of hope to revive communication leads to many drama scenes in my mind. "She will not like it… she will say it’s a waste… don’t waste… money should not be spent this way… she will start to complain again…" Such thoughts prevent me from having meaningful conversations.

Our differing perspectives complicate matters. Anticipating disagreement, I prevent myself from deeper conversation, thinking there is no point. The presumption that "I know how she will respond" shuts down communication. This is the essence of family baggage. This baggage becomes the repository of a complex mix of emotions, expectations, and past grievances. It weighs on our interactions, leading to a cycle of presumption and miscommunication that stifles relationship.

So, how to deal with family baggage? How to rid ourselves of this burden that damages our relationships? How can we give each other the chance to grow, even when it seems nearly impossible?

If we believe that whoever is in Christ is a new creation, the old has passed away, and the new has come, it is right to expect something new in Christ. I unload all my baggage to Christ, letting Him deal with it and deal with me. I trust he will grow something new in me.

Christ is the cornerstone of my life. I believe our faith in renewal through Christ is a powerful catalyst for change. Trusting that I am a new creation in Christ allows me to drop old interaction patterns and embrace transformation. In the face of family baggage, I acknowledge that I cannot force change upon others. However, I can change the conversation dynamics through my transformation in Christ. I pray that relationships will improve, but this is not a call for immediate change. It is a hope that, in time, they too will find their path of growth in Christ.

Dealing with family baggage is a journey that requires patience, understanding, and faith. It involves recognizing the patterns that hold me back, opening opportunities for communication, and trusting in the power of the Gospel.

As I navigate this path, the baggage I carry becomes lighter. This is not because it has been taken away completely, but because I know Christ will take it away as I continue to trust in His love and grace.

In Missional Spirit,

Pastor Forest

PS: Family includes our church family.